Its 8:15 a.m. and I stand here in the bus stop waiting for the office
bus to arrive. I stand here in the same manner as I did a few years
back waiting for my college bus. Little did I know then that things
would change so much in 2 years; the sky under which I am standing
seems to be looking at me and smiling .. It is perhaps the only thing
that has acted as a witness .. watching the transformation of a loud
and bubbly person into a quiet professional.
I wouldn't blame the professionalism for the change though. It is
destiny, or may be you could call it life. Yes Life, esoteric in the
true sense, for one does not understand why you meet hundreds of people
everyday, work with so many, and still remain lonely.
I am now in one of the corner seats in the bus, looking out of the
window watching people trying to catch up with "life" .. It's an hour's
journey and the only company that I generally have is the chatter of
the RJ. I seldom notice the person sitting next to me, for its going to
be yet another stranger or may be you could say another acquaintance.
It is annoying at times when the radio is switched off, not because I
am cut off from the melody but because I would now be thrust with
thoughts of the solitary journey ahead.
I can't help thinking about the short bus journeys to college ... well
it's a paradox to call a distance of 30 KMs "short", but that is how it
always seemed. A typical college day always begins in the bus with all
the familiar faces; you look forward for all your friends to get in
from the various stops, the reasonless giggles, the loud laughter that
were stifled to avert the eyes of the lecturers and professors who
would watch on us as if we were their prospective prey for the day ....
well as I said it was a different life then. The pleasant memories of
college are in itself good enough to save me from the misery of the bus
I notice that it is time for me to get down and flash my smile of
acknowledgement to all the known strangers that I see as I approach my
cubicle. A few of my colleagues greet me with their morning wishes and
as always, we exchange our pleasantries. Discussions jump to the
weekend plans and I wonder what I'd do over the weekend.
It would be just another day staring at the mobile, wishing it would
ring and bring back some wonderful moments that are now missing in life
or maybe the safer option would be to come to office, for it's my new
founded World these days. A few years back, weekends or weekdays
didn't matter to me, I was always busy. I always stood doubting the
authenticity of the wall clock that seemed to be in running too fast to
perceive its movement. Alas, now it seems as though my clock is
suffering from some kind of paralytic attack.
There is a time in life, where one needs to go ahead, leaving behind
your friends and carrying along only memories. You do make new friends,
but then you never get the old close ones ... you do meet people who'd
be so good to you that you could tell them anything and everything, but
you do not find a person to whom you needn't say things ... friends who
just know you. Occasional calls from such friends, have been the only
thing that I seem to look forward to ...However, I cant help but notice
the uneasy pause that lingers around the conversation ..A pause not
because of the relationship, but because it is too short a duration to
say everything, and of course you cannot completely rule out the
paucity of words!
As I sip coffee from the ubiquitous coffee mug, watching the drops of
rain, trickling down the tinted glass panes, veiling the scenic beauty
outside, I tell myself, may be there will be a day when things will
change, when life will offer a rewind, a recap of all the events and I
just have to wait.
Capricious are the ways of life, for I know there would be many who'd
be able to empathize with me, ironically, even the dear ones that I
miss this moment, waiting perhaps...!!
And I keep on waiting......
Monday, July 7, 2008
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