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Saturday, June 8, 2013

A Conversation with Khans!

After a friend suggested I downloaded we chat from appstore which is a beautiful app to chat with any one on the globe and do much more. I won a contest and got an opportunity to talk to the "Khans" of bollywood. With out Khans bollywood is incomplete and I cant thank my stars enough for getting a chance to chat with the Khans. I not only got an opportunity to chat but also to record and present it to the world. Now who is not interested in their cat fights , cold wars and open rebukes.

In short Indians are fond of any news or gossip bollywood dishes out. I was given a date and time when all the Khans would be "online". I added and invited all of them to a group chat. My heart skipped a beat when I saw that Shahrukh Khan of all was online first. The conversation went some thing like below





Me : Hey Shahrukh ! I can't believe its you !

Shahrukh: You gotta believe Afshan. Chote chote mobiles me aisi badi badi baatein hosakti hai ( In small mobiles big things do happen) ;)

The sentence ringed in my ears exactly in SRK's tone!

Me : Oh ! I am just lucky to get a chance like this Shahrukh. I am a big fan.

Shahrukh : Loads of love and hugs to you Afshan.


Salman: Ohhu Ohhu!

Me: "OOPS! Salmaan Khan. You are finally online. Wow!"

Salman: I came online five minutes back Miss. Afshan. Was just keeping silent as you were busy with your hero!

Me : "Oh. I am sorry Sallu. I am so glad you came!"

By that time every one was online.

Me : "So we all are finally here. Its like a dream come true ! Wow. I still can't believe it. Pinching my self hard to believe : ) :) "

Saif : "waaaw . Don't pinch hard baby. It might redden and pain but laal mere dil ka haal hai!" (red is the color of my heart.)

Me: "Saif ! Welcome to We chat." 

Aamir : " Oh my God ! What a bad opening line it was Saif.  Looks like you are adopting the humor skills of some one else."


Me : "Hello Aamir . How you doing ? Why don't you have a pic on your profile?"

Shahrukh : "Perfect people don't do self promotion Afshan. Don't you know that? ;) "

Me :  :)

Aamir : Who needs a pic when I am all over. "Humse door jaoge kaise, dil se hame bhulaoge kaise ... hum woh khushboo hai joh saason mein bastein hain, khud ki saason ko rok paoge kaise!" (How can you go away from me? How can your heart forget me? I am that fragrance which lives in the breath. How can you stop breathing?)


Me: "Wow! Good one Aamir!"


Salman : "Wah ! That was some opening line Aamir. Bravo!"


Shahrukh : "Some one is trying to copy some one else's forte of romancing here!" 


Me: "Guys please don't start here. Let me hop over to others and Aamir please put up a pic. It will make us feel good."


Aamir : "If you insist. Hmmm . Ok I shall put one!"






Me: "Hello Irfaan Khan. Why so serious ?"


Irfaan Khan : "Because I don't talk nonsense and waste time!"


Me: "OOPS! Sorry Irfan. So my question for you is how does your success feel now? You have been in foreign movies and both fared well. We all loved Slumdog and Life of Pi and Paan Singh Tomar was sure a legendary movie. Congrats on your success!"

Irfaan : "Feels good to see that you at least recognised it. Good films have no value and no awards you know".


Shahrukh : "Oh! Stop cribbing Irfaan. You already bagged an award and still you are not happy!?"


Me: "Anyway . Welcome Arbaaz. It is nice to see you after a long hiatus."


Arbaaz Khan : "Glad you noticed now. Other wise I was thinking Munna to badnaam hogaya!"


Saif : " Ya Ya ! You are going to put Munna badnaam hua -  a gay item song in Dabaang 3 or what.? LOL!"


Shahrukh : " Ha Ha! That was a good one Saifu . Gimme five!"


Salmaan : "Zyada baat kia to itni ched karenge ki conphuge hojaooge saasen kahan se le aur @@#*(@ kahan se!"


Arbaaz : "Wait and see all of you . With Dabaang 3 we will earn so much that we will be buying all the IPL teams."

Saif : "Aah ! Wishful thinking Arbu. Who will watch Sonakshi Sinha again and again? I mean C'mon man she comes in my dreams and scares me these days!"

Salmaan : "Hold your tongue Nawaab Saheb. Your wife acted in fevicol song. She was obliged to act with me ;) "


Saif : "And that is why Dabaang 2 was a hit!"


Shahrukh : "Give me five again Saifu!"


Aamir : "These petty fights are some thing which don't interest me. Thats why I don't come to award functions or such group chats!"


Shahrukh : "Ya Ya! It is rightly said that all work and no play makes Jack a dull boy :P "


Me : "Shahrukh please. Aamir doesn't like jokes . So please refrain !"


Shahrukh : "O.K. Shhh. All of you! Let M.R.Perfect talk here!"




Fardeen :Sniff Sniff


Me : "Oh my God ! Fardeen. You were also in the group right ? Why didn't you say hi? I am really sorry Fardeen !"


Fardeen: "I am really hurt. I want to leave this conversation. No one noticed me."


Me : "Listen Fardeen. I am really sorry!"


Saif : "Arey vaise notice bhi kaun karega ? Who will notice you man ? Pyar tune kya kia aur uske baad tune kuch kaam kia ? "


Shahrukh: "Oh my God! Saif. You are on a roll today. What did Kareena make in break fast man? My stomach is aching from all the laughs!"

Saif : "He was in "No Entry" after which Salman never gave him entry in any of his movies. LOL!"


Shahrukh : "Guys. I need a loo break! I am dying laughing here."


I was suppressing smiles but as I was the host I did not reveal it. Fardeen left the conversation angrily.


Me : "Guys. Please behave. I was given just one hour time slot to talk to you all and ask questions but you guys are just too much. Please co-operate. We are running out of time! My apologies Fardeen. Hope you check my reply later!" 

Salman : "Just because you acted in a zombie movie which fared well you don't have to sit on cloud 9 Saif.  Don't forget Agent Vinod and Cocktail where only heroines played pivotal role so that the whole team could be saved from bankruptcy. By the way do you know that your look alike works in a gas station. I am forwarding his pic guys. Have good laughs!'


Shahrukh : "Oh! Come on Sallu. You don't have to be so rude. Ya we all know Ek tha tiger earned 100 crores and all that but even kids are not watching when it is getting relayed on T.V.!"


Irfaan leaves the conversation.


Me : "Guys. It is my sincere request. Please stop fighting. Irfaan got pissed off and left even with out informing!"


Salman : "Ya Ya. Jab tak hai Jaan over acting karega na khan!" 

               (Till he is alive SRK will overact!)

Aamir : " Sorry Afshan. I also have no time for this nuisance. We shall chat some other time. I also have to go for shooting of a song from Dhoom 3!"


Saif : "LOL!" 


Aamir : "What is so funny in it ?"


Saif: "Action movie and you! The combination is slightly funny."


Aamir : "See you Afshan. I have no time for these virtual skirmishes!" 


Me : " "


Shahrukh: "You mocking JTHJ. You know right that I smooched your girl Katrina. Did you watch the movie ?"


Salman : "Enough of this nuisance. Sorry Afshan. Even I have to leave this conversation!" 


Arbaaz : "Bhayya! Wait. Even I will join you. Have to discuss the budget of Dabaang 3 . Bye Afshan!"

Saif : " Ha ha ha . Some one's sentiments got hurt Shahrukh. You should not have done that!"


Shahrukh : "Arey its ok. No one is  prudent here. By the way is your tattoo intact? Your wife won't be happy if it got smudged or some thing!
"


Saif : "Oh ! Come on . I do have it. There is no need to flaunt it always right ? Anyway I am getting a call from Kareena. Its time for yoga classes. Sorry guys. I too have to leave!"


Me: "Saif before you leave can you please forward a wedding pic which is not seen by many. I would be humbled!"


Saif : "Of course pretty lady. You are the host. Here you go!"





Me : "Mashaallah! It sure is royal Saif. Thanks a lot"

Saif : "Pleasure is mine. Ciao all of you!"

Me : "So its just you and me now Shahrukh and my one hour is also over. I just want to end this conversation by saying that I love you a lot and I am eagerly waiting for a fun movie from you!"

Shahrukh : "Sure dear. Wish me good luck. Even I have to get going. Wish you all the very best!"

Me: "Can you please forward me a latest  still from Chennai Express?"

Shahrukh : " Here you go!"




Me: "Wow Shahrukh!You made my day. All the best for the new movie and see you!"

Hence the conversation finally ended with many conflicts between KHANS. So you now know what happens when all Khans come under one roof , I mean one chat group ! I was not able to ask much but it for sure gave fodder to news channels for a week.News channels got in to disputes to buy the copyrights of this recorded conversation!

I became famous over night and earned a lot. 

A person who can interact and chat a lot connects well with the people and remains a "people's person!" So what are you waiting for? Download "We Chat" and chat away to glory! I am hooked to we chat from the day I downloaded . Few plus points are


  • Unlike many other apps we chat works with a unique id and you can use it on a tab or an ipad or ipod too.
  • The special emoticons are cute and funny.
  • Video call is pretty clear and it feels good as it is free of cost :)
  • Voice message option is great too.
  • One more great feature is you can log out when you are not using it :)
  • If you want to know who is online you have a unique shake option and also a look around option if you want to make new friends. 
All these features make this app quite unique!




Do check out the cool "We chat" ad and the details on You tube -"here"


This post is a part of "Indiblogger's"   "We Chat With Anyone, Anywhere" contest.
Thanks for reading.

26 comments:

  1. Wowwwwwwwwwwww.... that was sooooooo damn cute and hilarious at the same Afshan!!

    Wish you all the best for the contest :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks Privy !
      Am glad You could smile. Thanks for the wishes ;)

      Delete
  2. hahaha!! Very funny Afshan! :) :)
    I liked your conversations with SRK and Sallu the best! ;)
    Saif looks weird in that pic! :-/

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. In which pic ? Shaadi waala ? or u got confused with duplicate :P
      Ya I too liked SRK's and Sallu's more :)
      Thanks for liking it Pixie

      Delete
  3. Loved the big trio's conversations :D So apt! Your enthu seemed very real. Nice :)
    Good luck!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Yaar pahale to tum yeh batao ye sab tumhare dimaag mein aata kaha se hai.... baki baatein baad mein uske baad.

    On a serious note, i thoroughly enjoyed it. Wish you all the best for the contest. Cheers!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. bas fantasy jab extremes me jaati hai tab. ab SRK saath me ho to ye sab hojata hai na preeti ;)
      Anyway glad that U njoyed. Thank U

      Delete
  5. LOL :D The Khans had to feature here... :D
    All the very best for the contest!
    Cheers :)

    ReplyDelete
  6. LOL!! That was awesome and hilarious, Afshan!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks Roshni :) I am glad you found it funny XOX

      Delete
  7. You have some imagination Afshan. I thoroughly enjoyed reading this :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thnk U Shail . It defntly boosts me. Glad U njyed

      Delete
  8. LOL Afshan! That is some imagination :D :D
    It was a cool read ... laughed all the way

    ReplyDelete
  9. Areee baap re! I am just glad that Sallu and SRK did not come to blows. :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ya if it was a real convo ;) F To F they would have done that :P

      Delete
  10. this is a good one :D
    But hey I loved your other post :D
    That made me go "WOW" :D
    Doesn't mean this one is any less wow :D
    You're an amazing writer :)
    Stalking your blog :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks for stalking me :)
      Ya I wrote this first . I guess many liked second one
      thanks for reading

      Delete
  11. The pic of petrol bunk guy...howlarious.
    Good luck.

    ReplyDelete
  12. loved osme of the jokes between Salman, SRK and Saif.....and that petrol guy's pic is epic :P
    Gud one girl... :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank U Ghata , Ya the trio's convo is my fav too

      Delete
  13. ...and this is one group chat where I read the chosen ones 'leaving' the chat! That makes everything so very real! Hurt egos and all...

    Arvind Passey
    www.passey.info

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks for visiting my blog :) ya hurt and egos hit easily when Khans talk :)

      Delete

What do you think about this ? I always love to hear back. A comment or a brickbat boosts me to write more but the mud slinging shall be promptly vacuumed.

Thanks for your time :)